Tuesday, January 15, 2013

Dr Phils "Evil Eight" (three important lists)

I ran across the first of these three lists and looked up another source and found the last two.
Some, actually more than some, items are ones that I personally and many others have experienced and fought through to see the Truth and the Light at the end of the tunnel .
To him that overcomes...

Dr. Phil's Evil Eight
Arrogant entitlement
Lack empathy
No remorse/guilt
Irrational/self-destructive
Thrive on drama
Brag about outsmarting
Short term relationships (goes through trusted staff frequently, my note)
Fantasy world/delusional



Signs of a Cult
  1. Absolute authoritarianism without meaningful accountability.
  2. No tolerance for questions or critical inquiry.
  3. No meaningful financial disclosure regarding budget, expenses such as an independently audited financial statement.
  4. Unreasonable fear about the outside world, such as impending catastrophe, evil conspiracies and persecutions.
  5. There is no legitimate reason to leave, former followers are always wrong in leaving, negative or even evil.
  6. Former members often relate the same stories of abuse and reflect a similar pattern of grievances.
  7. There are records, books, news articles, or television programs that document the abuses of the group/leader.
  8. Followers feel they can never be "good enough".
  9. The group/leader is always right.
  10. The group/leader is the exclusive means of knowing "truth" or receiving validation, no other process of discovery is really acceptable or credible. 

Ten signs of a safe group/leader.

  1. A safe group/leader will answer your questions without becoming judgmental and punitive.
  2. A safe group/leader will disclose information such as finances and often offer an independently audited financial statement regarding budget and expenses. Safe groups and leaders will tell you more than you want to know.
  3. A safe group/leader is often democratic, sharing decision making and encouraging accountability and oversight.
  4. A safe group/leader may have disgruntled former followers, but will not vilify, excommunicate and forbid others from associating with them.
  5. A safe group/leader will not have a paper trail of overwhelmingly negative records, books, articles and statements about them.
  6. A safe group/leader will encourage family communication, community interaction and existing friendships and not feel threatened.
  7. A safe group/leader will recognize reasonable boundaries and limitations when dealing with others.
  8. A safe group/leader will encourage critical thinking, individual autonomy and feelings of self-esteem.
  9. A safe group/leader will admit failings and mistakes and accept constructive criticism and advice.
  10. A safe group/leader will not be the only source of knowledge and learning excluding everyone else, but value dialogue and the free exchange of ideas. 

2 comments:

  1. Good thing not all the Grace Fellowship churches were like the one you went to!

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    Replies
    1. There are other denominations that also have this problem and is not limited to GF. I know that each GF body was different. However, the spirit and doctrine behind them was and still is the same, part of which is the supremacy of the pastor and the pastor is made to be infallible in the congregation's eyes. Before my departure I was noticing how often the expulsion (which started an offense and the doctrine) and their derision of the AOG was brought up at the different rallies, revealing the bitterness and unforgiveness that was still there. To the best of my knowledge the poison of that offense is still running deep. Would like to talk about it if you desire. If you want to email me you are welcome to, at soagr @ outlook . com.

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